Tag Archives: orgasm

Women Coming with Salad

Laurie and Debbie say:

At the beginning of this year, The Hairpin identified a trend of advertisements that show women, by themselves, eating salad and laughing, grinning, generally having quite a good time.

Sociological Images picked it up, reproduced some of the photos, and made some brief comments about advertising designed to “convince you that the product will make you happy.”

True enough, as far as it goes. However, these women aren’t just happy, they’re ecstatic. You might say “orgasmic.”

So what is it about women getting off on their salads? It’s not just “food makes you happy” because we don’t see comparable pictures of women laughing with soup (which is just as “healthy”). Salad is the canonical diet food. It’s what you’re supposed to eat if you want to lose weight. It’s what you’re supposed to eat if you are thin and want to “watch your weight.” If you’re a woman, it’s basically what you’re supposed to eat for two meals a day. It’s what you’re supposed to feel guilty if you don’t order. And because it has all this baggage, no matter how good it really is, ordering it and eating it often feels like an obligation. The advertisers seem to think that women won’t order salad unless it comes with orgasm as the dressing.

Products advertised to men are often sexualized in the context of “buy this and a conventionally sexy woman will appear on your arm” but products advertised to women are more commonly sexualized in the context of “buy this and you’ll be a conventionally sexy woman.” These pictures makes the statement that eating salad alone will get your nipples hard. You don’t need anyone’s help to get off, just a nice fresh salad.

Who wouldn’t want a salad that … satisfying?

So what brings this up now, many months after the blog posts? A bunch of very clever women and a Hallowe’en costume. Check it out.

Chasing the Ever-Elusive G-Spot

Laurie and Debbie say:

What better way could there be to start a new year of body image blogging than with orgasms, g-spots, and loony researchers?

The marvelous Dr. Petra Boynton goes after the ever-reliable team of U.K. sex researchers led by Tim Spector of St. Thomas’s hospital, who, four years ago, explained that “The theory is that the orgasm is an evolutionary way of seeing if men can prove themselves to be likely good providers or dependable, patient and caring enough to look after the kids.”

With researchers like these, who needs comedians?

The clowns are back, this time making the almost-flat statement that there is no such thing as a g-spot. Really? Fascinating. This conclusion is based on the fact that some pairs of female identical twins have different g-spot experiences. As Dr. Petra says:

Aside from being limited by self report and problematic wording of questions, the study really seems to capture the diverse ways women enjoy pleasure rather than the requirement of a g spot to have orgasms. It’s also concerning within the introduction of the paper the researchers repeat the message they’ve written in related studies – “knowledge of the anatomy, biology, physiology, and pathophisiology of female sexual function is limited. Female orgasm, in particular, is a complex phenomenon that is far from being understood”. This indicates a worrying lack of awareness of the wider evidence base on female sexual functioning that is not limited in scope, but does take issue with the stereotype of women’s orgasm being both complex and mysterious.

Here’s our favorite quote from the mainstream media reporting the story:

While 56% of women overall claimed to have a G-spot, they tended to be younger and more sexually active.

Note how the reporters are cramming themselves into the clown car with the scientists: in one sentence, they cooperate to 1) throw away the experience of more than half the women in the study as nonscientific; 2) turn the tables on the “distrust older and less sexually active women” so that the younger and more sexually active women can be distrusted; and 3) completely ignore the obvious conclusion that the more sexually active a woman is, the more likely she is to have experimented with looking for a g-spot.

Okay, now that we’ve thrown away the study, we have a few more points to make.

First, as with effectively every media treatment of body image, the main point is to make you feel inadequate. They used to make you feel bad about not having a g-spot; now they’re trying to make you feel delusional (and too young and sexually active) if you are getting pleasure from yours. This is particularly interesting since until very recently g-spots were not commodified: it’s only in the last few years that anyone has been making money on women’s nervousness about the existence and size of their g-spots. Body image shaming is certainly a huge source of income, but the underlying driver is simply making people (mostly women) hate themselves, which takes away their power. (And then, of course, industries spring up to take advantage of the energy that’s channeled into self-hatred.)

Second, Dr. Boynton makes a fascinating point about g-spots and the media:

The media have played no small role within this story, in particular women’s magazines keen to talk about sex but without being too raunchy. It’s no coincidence the g spot has had so much media coverage. As any journalist will tell you it’s much easier to get a g spot past your editor than mention the clitoris. Something that editors dislike and advertisers run scared of. It’s much easier to mention the g spot or show a picture of a g spot stimulating sex toy than it is to mention other genital names or frankly discuss what you actually need to do to stimulate a partner.

Third, of course, neither the reporters nor the scientists are the least bit interested in what is almost certainly true: women are different from one another. Some have very sensitive, extremely pleasurable, easy-to-find g-spots. Some have g-spots that are hard to find, or somewhat less pleasurable, or smaller, but identifiably there. Some women almost certainly don’t have g-spots, or at the very least don’t have g-spots that make any difference to their sexual pleasure. And some women couldn’t care less. We’re all different. Sadly, getting your editor to print that story is even harder than getting the clitoris into the article, so where this gets said is on the blogs. That’s Dr. Petra’s take-home message too:

Women are diverse. Some of us really enjoy vaginal stimulation by finger, penis, sex toy (or other item). Some women prefer clitoral, anal, breast or other stimulation.

Don’t miss Dr. Petra’s final link:

Research by the Institute for Studies found there was no physical evidence for the mysterious figure who shows any interest in female orgasms, erogenous zones and the idea that women are supposed to enjoy it too.

Professor Helen Archer said: “We tested 1800 pairs of male twins and each and every one of them couldn’t give a shit.”

When the clowns are driving the news media, real humor can be our best defense.

Thanks to oursin for the pointer.