Laurie and Debbie say:
Melissa McEwan at Shakesville took the occasion of finding an ad for “Jingle Jugs” (they “jiggle to the jingle ‘Titties and Beer’ by Rodney Carrington) to pull together a somewhat more alarming collection of women’s bodies as bathroom furniture. This one apparently is (or was) in use in the Virgin Airlines men’s room at Kennedy Airport in New York City.
It got us to thinking: what if there were similar products based on men’s bodies?
You’d start light: the towels in some women’s rooms would be designed like beards, “to give that genuine scratchy feeling as you dry your face.” Maybe the faucets would have Adam’s apples.
Then, we’d get to the meat of the matter. One obvious choice would be to design toilet paper rolls with dicks at the center: roll the dick to get clean paper to wipe your butt. Come to think of it, the right dicks would also make good bidet faucets. Or, you could just get simple, and have a random dick pointing up from the base of the toilet bowl, like the animals in little kids’ drinking cups.
Or, of course, you could build something very like these
with lots of hair on the legs and butt, and exaggerated muscle definition.
How do you think people would react? We’d guess that in some corners of the gay male world, delighted giggling would ensue. In fact, you might find these things there already. Women would probably divide between giggles and a complete unwillingness to use the porcelain in question. Straight men, of course, wouldn’t see the objects (just as women don’t see the ones Melissa showcases), but they’d hear about them from women–a lot faster than we hear about the female ones.
And then the uproar would ensue. No one would admit that he was bothered. The argument would be simple: “Women take their children into these bathrooms! This outrage must be stopped!”
And bingo, your male toilet furnishings would be gone.
We wonder if there are changing tables in the men’s rooms with these female fixtures.