Laurie Toby Edison

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“There’s No Virginity to Steal”

Debbie says:

Zach calls himself “debaser9779,” on YouTube. I don’t know what he’s debasing, but he’s out to deconstruct gender in a big way. This one uses Madonna’s lyrics. Other videos are based on songs by Lady Gaga and T-Swift, and are called “Gender Neutralizing: Porn This Way” (part of a larger “Gender Neutralizing” series) and “Fuck Heteronormativity”. What could be bad?

The lyrics (which are reproduced below) are not only funny, they’re sharp. And, of course, they made me think of Hanne Blank’s excellent Virgin: The Untouched History, which I reviewed here. I bet Zach has read it.

Zach doesn’t sing very well, and somehow he makes that a plus. Don’t miss the little smart-ass comments below each video on his YouTube pages.

Santa: “Ho, ho, ho! What would you like for Christmas, little girl?”
Zach: “I want an Xbox, a pony, and a virginity!”
Santa: “Little girls don’t play Xbox. I’ll bring you a pretty pony!”
Zach: “What about a virginity?”

A couple of Feministing bloggers have declared him their “Internet Crush of the Week,” and that’s how I found him (and where I grabbed the lyrics).

I’m subscribing. I want more. Maybe a little parody and humor will get some of these messages through to some new folks?

***

I made it through the awfulness
Somehow I made it through
Didn’t know how fucked up it was
Until I fucked you

I was made to feel
Incomplete
Like sex could make
A piece of me go missing

But you made me think
Yeah you made me think
What can sex really do?

I’m not a virgin
Because virginity isn’t even real
Not a virgin
It’s just a heteropatriarchal construct
Designed to police how you feel

Gonna get all your consent, love
And give all mine too
There’s no reason to “save” our bodies
By denying what we want to do

We won’t lose
If we choose
That something new
I want to do with you

Our bodies are our own
Our bodies are our own
And that’s always true

I’m not a virgin
Virginity is pretty much arbitrary
Not a virgin
It gets used to justify violence
And that’s really scary

Yeah that’s really scary
Violence is the worst
Really, really bad

We won’t lose
If we choose
That something new
I want to do with you

It doesn’t need ending
And it doesn’t need defending
Virginity isn’t even a thing

We’re not virgins
There’s no virginity to steal
We’re not virgins
It creates a hierarchy of sex acts
Where only the top one is “real”

We’re not virgins
Oh, we’re not virgins
It feels so fine to say
Virginity
Is such bullshit
Oh yeah, we’re not virgins
Oh oh oh, we’re not virgins

One Response to ““There’s No Virginity to Steal””

  1. Nancy C Says:

    Thank you for a refreshing counterpoint to some of the other things I have been reading in the news lately- the founding of the Obedient Wives Club in Malaysia, or about a woman (twice married) in the Philippines that just had her hymen “restored” so as not to have cheated on her next husband.

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